By Scott Hasenbalg
I wish I could post that the Chapmans are doing "great”, but like Steven said last Friday at the private viewing, “The only way we will get through THIS, is because of THAT”, and he pointed to the cross hanging above Maria’s casket and said, “only because of the resurrection of Jesus Christ”. In reality, they are not “doing great” but they are clinging to the GREAT ONE—Jesus. I am with them almost daily, and needless to say they are saddened and overwhelmed. They are overwhelmed by both the devastation of the tragedy and the outpouring of prayers and love from so many.
SATURDAY’S MEMORIAL SERVICE
In classic Chapman fashion, the worship was, well, heavenly, and the Gospel was presented! The only way to find redemption in such a heart-breaking tragedy is to point to our great Redeemer. At the start, Michael W. Smith played the prelude and Matt Redman sang “Blessed Be the Name." Later two special songs were played, one which SCC had written and the other which he cowrote with Matt. Both were penned for two other families who had experienced the deaths of their own little girls. The first one, which Matt sang, had been written for Kerry and me back in January when we lost our little girl, entitled, "Close to Your Heart". The second was sung by Geoff Moore, entitled, "With Hope" written for the Mullican family when their little girl was tragically killed.
These songs brought so much healing to us and to the Mullicans in our own times of grief, and now it is our prayer that they will in some way aid in the healing of the Chapman family—ONLY GOD WOULD HAVE SCC WRITE SONGS BEFOREHAND THAT WOULD IN TURN MINISTER TO HIM AND HIS OWN FAMILY! Each of the older Chapman children shared a bit of their hearts and perspective that day, and the only comment I can make without going into great detail is that they are no longer just children of God, but men and women of God. Some of you may have heard something from the news or other channels about all of us being “bare foot” at the service. Well, long story short, the Chapman boys had been barefoot since the accident, and in support of them and in response to God’s leading through the words found in Exodus 3:5 “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground," the Chapmans and their extended family and friends walked into the service barefoot. Pastor Scotty Smith offered only one answer to this tragic death, which was the same which Jesus had given to Steven earlier that day, the answer of the resurrection from the dead. The service concluded with the voice of an angel (a.k.a. Tammy Jensen) singing "Jesus I am Resting, Resting" and finally a prayer.
SUNDAY - CALEB CHAPMAN'S GRADUATION
Although he was home-schooled this past year in order to be on the road with his dad, Caleb Chapman was scheduled to participate with his graduating class on Sunday. Prior to the accident, he was asked to share some special music and he agreed to do it, but considering the circumstances, he was given the option of not singing. However, he felt led to carry on in honor of his sister Maria. The song he was writing for his classmates that day he titled “Goodbye”; but little did he know it would have a dual meaning. Caleb not only got through the song, but he executed it with excellence. I am reminded of the scripture that says, “For where we are weak, He is strong”. Another memorable moment that day was when the graduating senior class walked into the auditorium without socks and shoes, as they too wanted to send a message that they are walking on holy ground, because the graduation was held in the same sanctuary as the memorial service the day before.
WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE
Even as I write this to you, Mary Beth has called me about some little question, and she cried. Ecclesiastes 7:4 states, “Sadness is better than laughter, for sorrow has great influence over us.” I believe that part of the message within this passage is that the tears we cry in the midst of our pain, God uses—much like water softens hardened ground—to tenderize our hearts so we may have a greater understanding of suffering and have compassion on a suffering world, a world that doesn’t know our Heavenly FATHER, the one who adopted us.
The Chapman’s are putting one foot in front of the other right now, and so are we at Shaohannah’s Hope. Many sent contributions to the Maria Miracles Fund in lieu of flowers, and we are all highly motivated to be good stewards of the support, and more importantly the overall work of Shaohannah’s hope, which is rooted in the Biblical mandate we ultimately have to carry out and live OUT the Gospel. A few months ago, Maria gave her life to Christ, and now she is living in a Big, Big House, with lots and lots of rooms. I know a part of the Chapman’s healing will come from this work that you and I are a part of together. The work of PURE RELIGION (James 1:27). In Isaiah 61:3 we read, “To all who mourn in Israel, He will give a crown of beauty for ashes”. Join me in prayer and partnership that God will make something beautiful out of this. It won’t bring back Maria’s life, but it will, Lord willing, paint a beautiful picture of Hope, Healing and Redemption.
Thank you for the updates and for your own testimony. Please let the family know we are all still praying for them.
Yeah.... The only way they will get through THIS is because of THAT...
Posted by: Aaron | May 31, 2008 at 06:32 PM
Scott and Kerry,
I have been following Jim Houser's blog ever since Maria's death, and someone posted a comment about your blog. I just read down through your postings of your own loss of Isabella. I am so sorry for your loss. Our 9 year old daughter, Ellie, died of cancer in December. We feel your pain, as well as the Chapman's very acutely. Thank you so much for the wisdom and love in your posts. I'm so glad that you and the Chapmans had each other in your times of grief. I have already been imagining Ellie and Maria dancing in Heaven together, and now that I know of Isabella, I can imagine Ellie holding her in her arms. Ellie sure loved babies! My brother is a missionary in Papua New Guinea and he sent me a story about a family in one of the tribes there who lost a little girl. The father's testimony to those crying outside of his hut was wonderful. I put the story on my blog: ellieskees.blogspot.com if you are interested... People all over the world are losing children, but it is wonderful to have Jesus and be able to grieve with HOPE. And as you said, be able to share one another's burdens. Thank you for giving us a window into the Chapman family's suffering so that we can continue to pray with even greater understanding! And now I will also be able to pray for you.
Posted by: Sarah | May 31, 2008 at 08:07 PM
We continue to pray, frequently, for each member of the Chapman family and ministry. Last night, while reading 1 Kings 8:6-12, I came to some phrases that have moved me to a place of quiet reflection. I am not sure yet all that the Lord will teach me through it but already, these verses have ministered to me. After Solomon had the Ark of the Covenant brought to its place in the Holy of Holies, beneath the wings of the cherubim, they (the cherubim) spread their wings over the ark. The cloud filled the temple, and the glory of the Lord filled the temple. Then Solomon said: "The Lord has said He will dwell in a dark cloud".
The Lord is with the Chapman's, even as He is with each of us, perhaps especially in this place of dark clouds. We are the temple, under the wings of angels, loved by the Lord. His glory still shines.
May the Lord of all comfort fill the temple that is each of you as you put one foot in front of the other. You are not alone, you are in His hands, under His angels' wings and in our hearts and prayers.
Posted by: Deb Gangemi | June 01, 2008 at 10:28 AM
Kerry,
I too have buried a full term baby. He was our first, and he would have been 12 this past March. I know that the Chapmans don't know me, but keeping up with their blogs have made them feel like family to me.
My heart is just breaking for them, and the tears just won't stop. I am literally praying wihtout ceasing.
I am absolutely convinced that out of these ashes will come incredible beauty. Steven's songs already seem like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "I want you to write this for Janele today".
When the new songs come, how much more are they going to minister to those of us who have lost children! And those in the world who want the Chapmans to curse God will be very disappointed! They will see dispair and agony... but they will also see forgiveness, peace, and grace only possible because of Jesus.
I wish I could be there, even though I'm a stranger to them, I have had to walk away and leave my child at the cemetary. Please just let them know that I am praying without ceasing for all of them, and that it is a privilege to carry them to Jesus on my knees.
Posted by: Janele | June 01, 2008 at 01:50 PM
Kerry,
AMEN, to everything you have said. We also felt like we just had to be there to show love and support to this precious family. What a blessing it was, we wanted to weep with them and love on them. Praise the Lord He allowed this to happen. This was an absolute blessing as well as one of the hardest things we have done in a while. Jerry & I realized we hadn't cried this hard and really grieved since his Mom died. This really was hard to take in, one of those Why Lord questions? We just love the Chapman family and everyone at SH and we felt like it was important for us to just be a witness to the love and support that surrounds them. Thank you for sharing your heart, your faith and your hope. We will continue to pray without ceasing for all of you. We are so grateful to be serving the Lord and taking this journey together to love and serve our King, to carry each others burdens and to lift each other up! We pray the Lords blessings on each of you. In His Timing & care, Eileen Mestas and family!
Posted by: ellie mestas | June 02, 2008 at 01:18 AM
Kerry,
We have been a fan of SCC for many, many years...since the very beginning. I have just finished the devotional you put together for Shaohannah's hope for families who are adopting. We are #13 on a list for a little boy from India. The Lord has given you a gift for writing and I am thankful that you are willing to share it to minister to and for others. Know that the Father has blessed our family through SCC, and your ministry as well. We are remembering you in our tears, our hearts and our prayers.
Candice (grownbyadoption.blogspot.com)
Posted by: Candice | June 02, 2008 at 10:53 AM
Scott and Kerry,
I am praying hard for you guys as well as the Chapmans. So glad you have been able to be there with them. Talk about beauty from ashes, Kerry!
Love you guys.
Natalie G
Posted by: Natalie Nichols Gillespie | June 02, 2008 at 03:33 PM
Hi Kerry.
Thanks so much for your posts. My family loves the Chapmans so much. We weep still for them and with them. My husband forgot to mention them at our dinner time prayer last night and my 5 year old, Aaron, was quick to chime in, "And please be with the Chapmans." I'm amazed at how many people have beed affected by Maria's homegoing. We lost my 21 year old brother almost 5 years ago (he was the baby of our family as well) and the pain is still so immense. I hurt so for my parents. I wanted to let you and the Chapmans know about an event being held in Nashville. It's called a Walk To Remember and it's sponsored by The Compassionate Friends (and organization for parents who have lost children.) Anyway, here is the web address:
www.tcfwalktoremember.org
It may be too soon for both families, but I know we like to do anything that honors the life our sweet Matthew. We will pray for you both as you grieve the losses of your precious daughters. Much love!
Posted by: Mandy | June 02, 2008 at 06:02 PM
I just cited this post in my new essay on Maria and the mourners, 'My Cheshire Cat' http://frankahilario.blogspot.com
Posted by: Frankenstein | June 04, 2008 at 05:25 AM
I just cited this post in my new essay on Maria and the mourners, 'My Cheshire Cat' http://frankahilario.blogspot.com
Posted by: Frankenstein | June 04, 2008 at 05:26 AM
I just cited this post in my new essay on Maria and the mourners, 'My Cheshire Cat' http://frankahilario.blogspot.com
Posted by: Frankenstein | June 04, 2008 at 05:26 AM
Scott and Kerry,
Your families have been through something that can not be described in words and we will continue to lift both families up in prayer. We understand that life will not be easy and sometimes unbearable, but God will be big for you all because you allow Him to be ... Thanks so much for all you do ... Our home is searching for our next step w/ the Lord ... We know He has plans for us and these losses have caused us to pause and focus on Him instead of trying to figure it out on our own ... We love the Chapman's, We appreciate Shaohannah's Hope and admire you and Kerry for tireless work to help orphans around the world ...
love and prayers daily !!!
Posted by: gwen oatsvall | June 04, 2008 at 11:41 PM
Jesus can they hear me...
I want them to know cuz of the cross I can go on and cuz of the cross Im not the only one cuz of the cross I keep my eyes on you cuz of the cross in death or in life cuz of the cross satan may try cuz of the cross God came to earth God gave His life cuz of the cross we been taught right cuz of the cross we are bought with a price cuz of the cross we been given bak cuz of the cross forgiveness and Hope cuz of the cross Death where is your sting cuz of the cross VICTORY for me begins cuz of the cross we cross over into life cuz of the cross IAM now ALIVE cuz of the cross I want to say cuz of the cross Jesus has made a Way cuz of the cross we to will be with Him one day cuz of the cross we must not forget cuz of the cross there are no regrets cuz of the cross we are persecuted from all sides cuz of the cross we have Truth with in the lie cuz of the cross the enemie wants you to die cuz of the cross dont cry God is Alive cuz of the cross its the message we must bring to all cuz of the cross we been set free once more cuz of the cross forgive for they do not know or see cuz of the cross He reached down to me cuz of the cross in my time of need cuz of the cross stephen was rescued like me up into the sky cuz of the cross he wasnt left alone to die cuz of the cross while being stoned cuz of the cross stephen not alone cuz of the cross it was Gods Amazing Grace Paul could see cuz of the cross ty for all you done for me cuz of the cross Glory He is cuz of the cross we can sing... cuz of the cross i'm with Him cuz of the cross you must go on cuz of the cross I died for the lost cuz of the cross dont let me die in vain cuz of the cross we will meet again cuz of the cross ur pain but my gain cuz of the cross what we dont see cuz of the cross Grace was sufficient for me cuz of the cross I did not die cuz of the cross Jesus and I are alive cuz of the cross smiling Jesus can they see cuz of the cross u and mee cuz of the cross ...
Jesus can they hear cuz of the cross u gave me 5 yrs cuz of the cross satan may have tried cuz of the cross please Jesus they must see ...
cuz of the cross let them feel ur Peace cuz of the cross calebs been set free cuz of the cross what satan meant for bad God rescued me cuz of the cross how can you not see cuz of the cross dont worrie for me cuz of the cross only Joy I see cuz of the cross it was the thief cuz of the cross please dont cry cuz of the cross caleb will be cuz of the cross a witness for me cuz of the cross the testamonies cuz of the cross satan didnt win cuz of the cross I know this is for Him cuz of the cross caleb JESUS MUST LIVE!!!
cuz of the cross please my family if you want to know what you can do is tell every one GOD LOVES YOU!!!
mountains over the hills and every where go tell every one Jesus cares ...
and Steven that ur marie is safe with me and u have a race ya must go on and show satan this is ur drive to continue to bring all Gods children home's and bak to life!!!
Jesus can they can hear me ...
Posted by: SHEEPIATOR | June 06, 2008 at 03:08 AM
I have thought alot about the Chapmans since I first read about their loss of Maria. I can't imagine the grief that they all feel but I lift them up in prayer as I know that God will lift them up and hold them close through this undefinable loss. God Bless you all for the ministry you continue to do while you are grieving for Maria.
Posted by: Nicki Tompkins | June 06, 2008 at 11:27 AM
WOW! thank you for sharing. so powerful. and please let them know that people still have NOT stopped praying for them.
Posted by: elaine | June 07, 2008 at 10:41 AM
I am grieved to hear about Maria. Months ago, I came to the site and was so inspired, I decided to write a story that would encourage people to consider children such as Maria.
I will continue to write my story, called "Amazing Gracie" and dedicate it to Maria's memory.
My prayers are with you all. I will pass the news along to our daughter Amber who will pray, as well.
My the Father wrap his arms around your family.
Jo-Anne
Posted by: Jo-Anne Holmes | June 25, 2008 at 02:28 AM
I am grieved to hear about Maria. Months ago, I came to the site and was so inspired, I decided to write a story that would encourage people to consider children such as Maria.
I will continue to write my story, called "Amazing Gracie" and dedicate it to Maria's memory.
My prayers are with you all. I will pass the news along to our daughter Amber who will pray, as well.
My the Father wrap his arms around your family.
Jo-Anne
Posted by: Jo-Anne Holmes | June 25, 2008 at 02:30 AM
Kerry,
Thank you for your continuing posts that are so filled with wisdom. We are praying for your family, and the Chapman family daily. Out hearts break for your families. I thought it would be alright if I posted some lyrics of Mark Shultz. You may even know him personally, but I thought this song was particularly encouraging. I hope it lifts you up today. Thank you for sharing about the Chapman family, too. There are so many of us that love them and feel like they're our family, too. I check back here daily, as well as SCC site to check on them. We are covering you all in prayer.
I call, You hear me
I’ve lost it all
And it’s more than I can bear
I feel so empty
You’re strong
I’m weary
I’m holdin’ on
But I feel like givin’ in
But still You’re with me
Chorus:
And even though I’m walkin’ through
The valley of the shadow
I will hold tight to the hand of Him
Whose love will comfort me
And when all hope is gone
And I’ve been wounded in the battle
He is all the strength that I will ever need
He will carry me
I know I’m broken
But You alone
Can mend this heart of mine
You’re always with me
Chorus:
And even though I feel so lonely
Like I’ve never been before
You never said it would be easy
But You said you’d see me through
The storm
Posted by: Carol~Arkansas | July 02, 2008 at 10:45 AM
Thank you so much for posting this blog. We keep the Chapmans in our prayers and will continue to do so. A good friend of ours in Ireland lost her little girl at around 20 weeks gestation due to Turners' Syndrome. Her service was on a podcast so that all of us here could listen and I was extremely moved. Their pastor delivered an amazing message and I wish everyone could hear it... http://richhillpc.blogspot.com/2008/02/funeral-service-of-adison-hope-parks-21.html
We'll be praying for you and your family too. Someday, when we're in Heaven, we won't even remember how tough these losses are. Have a good week :)
Posted by: Jill P. | July 08, 2008 at 11:14 PM
I lost my baby in a horrible car accident in May 2008 also. ( a family member was driving the car). I KNOW what the Chapman family is feeling right now. I want them to know they are not alone. When this happened to me ,I felt that I was the only mother in the world who had to bury her child. I have been in awe of what God can do in the mist of a horrible situation. I started to cry when I read you blog and saw isaiah 61:3 because this is what I cling to. That something beautiful will come out of this. I know it will. I smile because I will see my beautiful little boy again...The only way to get through THIS is because of THAT.. So true, So true. I am praying for the Chapmans along with my family.
Posted by: Tracie | August 09, 2008 at 03:12 PM
Our family lost our two oldest daughters in a car accident on 4/25/09. The pain is sometimes unbearable. By the grace of God we are able to rise to see another day.
The Protulipac Family
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The service concluded with the voice of an angel (a.k.a. Tammy Jensen) singing "Jesus I am Resting, Resting" and finally a prayer.
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