Kerry Hasenbalg

My Homeschooling Year

I have thoroughly enjoyed homeschooling this year!  Thank you Melanie Hall for encouraging Scott and me to begin this homeschool journey - and thank you Scott for really leading our family in this direction.  What a joy it has been to experience so many wonderful moments with my children - ones that I otherwise would have missed.  

Just today, Cole and I learned together that Alexander the Great was a private student of Aristotle.  And that somewhere in the 400 years of silence between God speaking through the prophet Malachi at the end of the old testament and then once again speaking through John the Baptist at the beginning of the New Testament, ALexander the Great through his quest to conquer the world ended up preparing the way for the spread of the Gospel by requiring that so many learn the Greek language. It is amazing to see in a second grade history class how so much bad is worked together for the good by God for His people not only for us today but throughout all of history.  Cole said, "If I lived during those 400 year I don't think I'd stand a chance - it would be so awful not to be able to hear anything from God for so long." 

And I am pleased to say that by an act of sheer grace, we will be finishing all of Cole's 2nd grade curriculum before the end of May.  Having gone through public school myself, I am not sure I can even remember reaching the end of a single textbook.  And honestly, even though it took diligence on both of our parts to get to this point, neither Cole nor I feel like it was terribly difficult, as it was for the most part just a whole lot of interesting fun!  

So, to my friends here in Danville, particularly Jen Swartzentruber, and to those of you who gave recommendations for curriculum on this blog last year, I want to really thank you.  Your suggestions were very helpful and a big part of why we so enjoyed this year.  Our four family co-op was also an added bonus for our school year. 

On the curriculum side, we ended up doing a Reason for Handwriting, Horizons Math, The World of Animals by Answers in Genesis for Science, Saxon Phonics for the first half of the year and English for the Thoughtful Child the second half of the year, leading Little Ones to God and Discoverer's Bible for Early Readers for Biblical Studies, The Mystery of History Volume I, and a smattering of great readers graciously loaned to me by Christian sisters who have children just a little bit older than Cole. 

Although I have not finished gathering all of my books for next year, here are the curricula I am leaning towards:  A Reason for Handwriting (cursive), A Reason for Spelling, (love the Biblical teaching embedded in every lesson) Horizons Math (could not be more thrilled with Horizon's math!!), the second half of the book English for the Thoughtful Child (it is a 2nd and 3rd grade book), Discoverer's Bible, and Sonlight's history and language/reading for third grade.  Although I loved Mystery of History this year, I have decided to try out Sonlight's history for third grade since their readers and read-alouds coincide with what is being taught in the main history curriculum.  I Still haven't landed on a Science curriculum.  Suggestions?    

And above all to You, Lord, I want to say thank you! Thank you for the grace to have enjoyed each day!  Thank you for the times you reminded me not to get distracted and lose my peace in homeschooling by allowing my mind to wander and my heart to be divided.  Thank you that all the housework, that I thought would never get done, did in fact get done, just fine, in your time.  Thank you for giving me the time to invest in the adult relationships you ordained for me without me having to fret about them or spend needless time striving to maintain them.   I pray that with this new baby coming and Maya now getting involved in her own homeschool curriculum you will give me the right amount of your grace and your clear guidance to continue to do and be as you ask of me for your good purposes and pleasure in this area of training up my children.  Remind me Lord how quickly this time will go, so that I do not miss what you desire for me to see and experience.  And Lord, if there comes a time when you call me to go in a different direction as it relates to schooling our children, help me to hear you and not be so tied to what I think is "more right" when it may not be "just right" in your mind and plan for our family!

(Don't forget to tune in to Fox - Greta Van Susteren tonight at 10pm (just after Jack Bauer's 24 Hour of Power!) to witness Jelani Freeman's live interview. )  

Responding to Broken Community

Relationships - Our Need For a Safe and Intimate Community By Bob Perdue

In our search for intimacy and community, we are often wounded and hurt. Our trust is violated and we erect walls that separate us from others. The desire to connect and belong is still strong but the fear of rejection and betrayal keeps us from moving forward.

Our response to this broken community varies depending on how we deal with our sin and wounds. Some live in the identity of the 'shamed' self, bearing all of the labels and lies that flow out of their sin or wound. If we respond this way, we refuse to put forth the effort to create a false self that is more socially acceptable. This shame drives us into isolation. We don't have broken relationships, we have no real relationships at all. We keep our walls tall and thick and refuse to let others in. Often isolation results in deeper shame and addictive responses to loneliness and bitterness.

Andy Comiskey, in his curriculum entitled "Living Waters" says that "man out of fellowship with God bends toward men." Some people, particularly those who tend to blame other people for their brokenness (others-contempt), turn toward narcissism. Since they cannot trust anyone, they will only trust themselves. If we respond this way, we create an image of ourselves that we can hide behind and through which we can interpret life. Relationships are all for the purpose of benefiting us. We struggle with authority because the rules of others do not always benefit us (It's not fair!). This narcissism is not always driven by self-love, but often by a deep self-hatred that is masked by the false self of narcissism. Relationships usually do not last or do not become deep because the we are so self-focused and self-protective that we cannot genuinely care about others.

Still others, particularly those who tend to blame themselves for their brokenness (self-contempt), turn toward relational idolatry or co-dependency which we described in a previous chapter. "In short, idolatrous relationships are based on the belief that another person can really make one whole." If this is the way we respond to our sin and wounds, we believe that we are weak and that we need another to lean in to, to fix or to take care of (the false self). Our relationships are imbalanced and may even end up abusive. We may believe that, because of our sin and wounds, we don't deserve to be treated well anyway. The unresolved shame can even convince us that we deserve the abusive treatment and we continue in difficult relationships and lose a sense of who we really are. Many times the idolatrous relationship turns strongly to the sexual aspect. Meeting someone else's sexual needs gives a sense of power that the powerless person desperately needs. This can lead to an addictive, never satisfied sexual addiction with no regard for health or self.

Whether we lean toward isolation, narcissism or relational idolatry, the fact is that authentic community, the kind we were created to experience, is not realized. This is why choosing community is a life choice, it moves us back into the direction of intimate relationship with God.

The first step in the direction of genuine community is confession. Not confession to God, which was part of choosing honesty, choosing forgiveness and choosing surrender. This time we are confessing to our brothers and sisters, our fellow strugglers, the members of our potential community. Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a man deeply committed to God and community writes, "A man who confesses his sins in the presence of a brother or sister knows that he is no longer alone with himself; he experiences the presence of God in the reality of another person." Sin demands isolation so while living in unconfessed sin, true community is not experienced. Confession, transparency, accountability, these are the watchwords of true community. Scripture clearly instructs us to "...confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed."

After the initial confession, a choice to be honest with the members of the community seals the bond of intimacy. As you become real with one another in community that is founded upon intimate communion with God, iron sharpens iron. You learn and grow from the strengths and weaknesses of the others in community. The honesty with which you approach each other in community and the time that you spend together forms a bond and begins to communicate God's unconditional love through human mouths and hands. This is experiencing life together. This is what you were created to experience!

Jelani Freeman interview with Greta Van Susteren

I want to encourage all those with an interest in adoption and foster care to tune in tomorrow evening (Monday) at ten pm to watch on Fox the live interview of former foster youth, Jelani Freeman, by Greta Van Susteren.  And if you haven't yet read the article which appeared on the cover of the metro section of the Washington Post on Saturday about this remarkable young man, you may want to do so - and can link to it from my last blog entry.  Praying for you Jelani!    

The Jelani Freeman Success Story

Tomorrow, my family has the distinct honor of attending the Law School Graduation of a dear friend of ours - a young man who has not only become like a brother to me but who is also one of my personal heroes, Jelani Freeman.  If you have a heart to see how God can guide one of His precious fatherless ones into greatness, please take the time to read the article about Jelani Freeman.