Not Afraid of Brokenness

"This is my body broken for you; do this in remembrance of Me."  Jesus

As I was taking communion this morning, while sitting up in the crying room, I was struck deep in my heart by Christ's words, "..This is My body BROKEN for you, do THIS..". I realized in a whole new way that perhaps "THIS" is far more than just taking communion, even more than just confessing our sins and being as grateful as we can manage for His sacrafice on the cross. Perhaps, "THIS" was to be understood fully by His people only after His work on the cross was completed. Perhaps the "THIS" that He is asking us to do in order to remember His being broken for the people entrusted to Him is for us to be willing to be broken for the people entrusted to us. Hhmmm?

Oh, how I often run from being broken for others! Recently, I was saying that I just don't have the grace to handle any more right now as a reason not to help out a friend asking for help. But today in church I realized that it wasn't so much that I was lacking the grace from God I needed to help out, but rather that I lacked the willingness of heart to be a member of God's broken body for the sake of another. I had failed to "do..in remebrance of Him." The request wasn't comfortable or convenient, but saying the grace isn't there isn't accurate. Grace is something that comes in the moment anyhow- not beforehand. Certainly, sometimes God is calling us to say "No" to do this thing or that thing. And the Bible is clear that "obedience is better than sacriclfice". But, today the Lord reminded me that being willing to be broken and die to "self" for the love of those given to me is to honor Him...to remember Him.

And in those times when I take on a lot for the sake of love and then my circumstances turn out to be very difficult, it doesn't mean His grace is not present. It may mean that if I acted out of obedience then my soul must need this time of refining. I read in a devotional this morning about how suffering has a way of purging selfishness from our souls. "Suffering purges away the rank of self-if you let it do it's work."

The picture below is a picture of me pacing the house with baby Leah that the kids and I sent to Scott last week while he was in Nashville. He asked what we were up to - so we sent him a picture.  With Scott away this week, it wasn't easy as Leah had some super fussy days. But being difficult doesn't mean the grace wasn't sufficient. "My grace is sufficient. My strength is made perfect in weakness." What the difficulty I experienced means is that He wants to perfect His strength in me by revealing my weakness and my need of Him. What it also did was show me my need of other members in the body of Christ and to learn gratitude. And I am very grateful for those who have been willing to sacrifice and be broken to help me in my need - and there have been many who have loved me sacrificially.   

Lord, help me remember You in the way that You have asked us to... by being broken for others in need.

Comments

[JulieinCA]

The Lord was speaking to me about this all week. How in the body we can become self absorbed and sometimes the best way not to focus on your own issues, is to look outside of yourself. When you are in a difficult season, it is hard to do that. I know that I need Grace and to be there for others too.

[Naomi]

Lovely post Kerry! Spot on!!! Although this can be so hard for us to hear at times, we do need to be reminded of the bigger picture! You are always such a blessing to me!

[Gretchen]

Hi Kerry-
I know that this is off topic...but Scott's profile needs to be updated to say you have 3 children instead of 2. :)